Blog On A Blog

Soundtrack: Saves The Day- See You

This blog is the result of two deleted blogs. I started the first one with the blog title "This Modern Love" which was basically going to explain the dilemmas of being in love. While writing that I found myself getting very mad about how much information I had to sensor. The second blog I wrote was a bitter, emotionally charged blog about how I was over sharing my personal life over a public space. Both were okay but not really something I felt comfortable with sharing.

So here I am now, trying to think of a way to express myself. Writing a blog is much harder than I thought. Its not just about writing down whatever is on your mind. There are many thoughts that go beyond just posting. You have to take in consideration your audience. This is why I think I tend not to write that often. The process is so grueling that I get weirded out before I even think about sitting down and creating a post.

I would like to blog more often but I find myself in this circle of not knowing what to actually post about. I will have one blog and then say Im going to blog next week. Next week turns into 3 weeks, and then into a month. After a month of not posting I feel like I should return with this amazing well thought out post that blows every ones minds away (which is weird because none of my posts in my opinion ever achieves that goal anyway). So when I feel like I dont have anything worth while to say I just dont blog at all. Then it becomes this thing where blogging is no longer fun to do but more of something I have to do.

I think Im going to start an equal blend of blogging about my life and about the world around me. That way I dont feel any pressure to share my life stories and I can enlighten myself with world news and give insight on how I feel about a certain topic.

I go through 5 NY newspapers a day so it should be too hard to at least post at least twice a month. Lets just cross my fingers that this happens.

Maybe I will complete the blog titled "This Modern Love" when I have some more thoughts about the issue. Who knows maybe I will never come to a complete thought that I feel worthy enough of sharing....

On Life, In Intoxication

Hearing a loved ones voice before you fall asleep makes everthing 10 times better.

ps. dinking is my favoirute past time!

If Its Not Love, Then Its The Bomb That Will Keep Us Together

Soundtrack: Jason Mraz- Life Is Wonderful

Its funny how it takes something bad to see something good. I dont know if its because most of us go through life and take things for granted, or we are just brush off and dont act on things until it is right in front of our face (maybe those were the same things just said differently).

Take for example a little incident that occured in New Orleans a few years ago, Hurricane Katrina. Its easy to see a lot of bad in the situation, I mean lots of people lots their lives, families were turn apart, and the nation went to war. But good did come out of the situation. Much of America came together and showed support for people in need, people took a second to appreciate how grateful they were to be alive, and how much they love the people around them.

It can be applied to many relationships as well. A lot of times people say that after their first big fight with their significant other that they feel much closer to the person. Its like it takes a fight to see that you actaully love the person. Maybe you realized it before but that fight makes it that much clearer that wow I really love this person.

Another example is just thinking of the fact of losing a loved one. People always worry that the person will go and that they didnt get a chance to say goodbye or that they loved the person. The bad thought of losing that person, brings on a positive reaction of taking that person for granted less.

I realized recently, that having things a little bad once in a while isnt exactly that bad. No I shouldnt take things for granted. But bad does make you appreciate the good a little more. Having things bad can serve as a learning experience for having a good future.

So is bad really that bad? Or is bad a little good?

Reality vs. Hollywood

So I never recapped about San Juan, and im not going to. But you can recap the trip by reading the blogs below and picking out your favorite moments, that way its more personalized.

Soundtrack: Backstreet Boys- Larger Than Life

So I work as a publicist for an entertainment company in New York City( I would say which one but I just read this whole article about blogging rules and listing your job wasnt a good idea). Part of my job here is to keep up with some of our clients by reading newspapers, weekly magazines (star, people, life and style, etc.) and checking blogs. Its a good idea in my field to keep yourself in the "know" so you are aware whats going on in the world (of hollywood that is). I mean its just like if I worked for an accounting firm I would read the wall street journal or Forbes to keep up with the industry. Before I started working here, I was you average celebrity fan. Meaning I kept up with some of them if I was watching TV and thought it was cool to see them out in public. I wasnt over the top with it to the point where I would track their every move and send them fan mail or anything but I had an interest.

Since I have started working here, I have a sad obession about reading what these celebrities are doing. Its weird because a part of me couldnt really care less since I started working here (like I see these "celebrities" out a parties and im hardly phased by it, all i care about is free drinks and food). But I do have this addiction to reading about thier lives. I check the celeb blogs (perezhilton, pinkisthenew blog, tmz, but NOT mediatakeout) almost everyday and like three times. I feel like I want to see what Britney is doing next, what Paris is doing in jail, or how life is treating Lindsay in rehab. I cant explain this addiction. And Im starting to dream about it.

Last weekend I had two different dreams about "hollywood" life. The first dream started off with me at my office and Im working like regular. And then I decide to go down the hall and watch Justin Timberlake get ready for his concert at Madison square garden. When I get there I run into his dancers and start chatting with them and they tell me to go further down the hall and look at Britney Spears because she was practicing for a club tour date. So I go down the hall and into a room which was a big concert venue and Britney was on stage. She was performing "Do Somethin'" and brought a guy up on stage and was like "You guys wanna see something hot" and so she goes this crazy leg grab thing and lifts her leg over her head. And the people watching went nuts. And then one Darren (from Darren's dance grooves) was like she lives off the crowd. So anyways then Britney takes it to the next level and stands next to the guy picks her leg up, reaches it around the guys shoulder and makes him lick her stilletto. When she does that the crowd goes wild and JT comes out. He looks at her and says "She Is Trying To Bring It Tonight", and thats when I wake up............

The next night I had another "hollywood" dream. That dream started out at an outdoor Arena at an American Idol tour. Sanjaya was about to go on stage and the crowd started going CRAZY. Right as he started to run down to the stage, I tranformed into him. But the funny thing is that MY Sanjaya character had lipstick (hmph). Anyways when I finally made it to the stage I became a member of the Backstreet Boys who were on thier come back tour. I was still Sanjaya but another memeber of BSB. Anyways we were debuting a new cover of a Keane song that somewhere only we know. I started the song off and sang the first verse. I was off the chain. So good I remeber taking my ear piece out cause I didnt need it. After we were done the crowd rushed the stage and I became a bouncer blocking everyone and then I woke up.


I had another one but I forgot to wirte it down. I think its crazy how much I read about these celebrities that I start dreaming about them. But I guess they make for fun dreams.

One more thing about my job that I feel like I should comment on is the fact that people think you are bragging when you say you work with celebrities. When I first started working in entertainment PR i would tell people some of the client I worked with and I could tell by the look on their face that they thought I was bragging (and that they kinda felt like i was better than them). So know when I tell people what I do, I say PR. And if they ask for more information I say entertainment. So that way I dont have to disclose my client listing and not make things akward......

San Juan (Day 4)

Day 4 of our trip in San Juan started at around 9:30. Again we woke up to sunny skies and a little bit of a headache from the drinking we did the night before. I laid in bed for a while and blogged about Day 3 while JC headed down to the beach to get some sun (I figured I would pass up on that opportunity because I’m already tan). After we finished up the morning routine we decided to take a trip to Old San Juan to finish up sight seeing and get some more Spanish food for lunch.

Even though I put a semi disclaimer up in the last blog about using yahoo travel to find restaurants, we cheated and went back on and picked the highest ranked restaurant in town called the Parrot Club. The food there again was great! I got some carne frita with plantains and rice and beans. I was never a fan of plantains before I came to Puerto Rico (and still cannot stand the sweet fried version) but I have to say it eventually grew on me and I was eating Mofongo like the best (hey when in Rome).

After lunch we decided to suck in our bellies and head down to Condado beach. Condado beach is the popular beach in Puerto Rico. The waves there were more intense than the ones in Isla Verde (which is where our hotel was) and that was good to finally be able to catch waves and swim. We stayed on the beach for about two hours and decided to head back over to Old San Juan to do some more sight seeing.

When we were leaving the beach, we noticed that there was a huge cloud and we could tell that is was about to rain. This wasn’t a BIG surprise to us because we were used to it by now. I haven’t mentioned in any of my post about the afternoon rains that we experienced each day. It was very odd because it would be super sunny in the morning and then it would rain for the afternoon for about an hour. Yesterday was the worst of the rains. When we got to the car we decided to make a trip to Coldstone and get some ice cream. When we got there, it started to pour. It poured REALLY bad. From the time we were in Coldstones until the time we were getting back to the car, the roads were flooded. We had to run back to the car in knee-high puddles. I lost both of my sandals (but mangaged to save our ice cream). It was crazy. We sat in the car for about 30min (and after I went back for my shoes) and waited for the rain to go away.

The rain eventually went away, and we headed over to a fort in Old San Juan. The views from the fort were amazing. The sun had come back out and a rainbow formed right around the fort (see picture to the left). We toured the fort for a while and decided to go back to the Hotel and take some showers and change clothes (because we were gross from the rain).

We picked a Spanish/ Cuban restaurant for dinner. The place was pretty good. It wasn’t my favorite restaurant of our trip but still the food was good. Again I ordered the Churrasco (which is by far my favorite dish; someone please let me know where I can get that in NYC). Dinner was followed by another trip to the Intercontinental Casino for some more 5cent slots. JC and I set a 10 dollar spending limit for ourselves. Our luck wasn’t that great last night and I left 15 bucks in the hole.

We were both pretty tired from the day and after the casino we headed back to the room and called it a night.

The Spanish word of the day was: Desayuno!

I will have a recap and final thoughts on Puerto Rico in my next post!

San Juan (Day 3)

Another day and another late blog. It gets harder to blog when your nights end with alcohol. And though I think its fun to blog while drunk, I dont think I want to do it while i'm in San Juan. I try to remember all that happend yesterday, because right now Im drawing a little blank on how it started.

I'm pretty sure it started out like every other morning. I woke up and looked out the window and noticed how it wasn't raining like the weather forcast said. It is so great to wake up on vacation and see the ocean out your window with a sunny sky (its like how its great when I'm in NYC and I wake up and see Yankee Stadium out my window). After a quick little clean up of last nights mess and posting a new blog, JC and I headed down to the beach to check things out. The temp yesterday was hotter than the previous days and it felt great. The water was a little colder (maybe it was because the weather was warmer so it was easier to notice) but it still was awesome. After laying around the beach for a little bit we decided that we wanted to take a trip out to El Yunque Tropical Rain Forest about 30 minutes from our hotel.

JC and I got changed and called down to have our car brought around front. When we got downstairs we noticed that our car wasn't out front. That was a little weird because everytime we call down they bring our car up fast. We asked the valet where our car was and he got this worried look on his face and informed us that we had a flat tire. JC went back up to the room and called Hertz and they said we had to bring the car back and exchange it out. The valet changed our tire and we were off to pickup some lunch and head over to the forest.

For lunch we went over to Pollo Tropical (Travis and Tasha don't be jealous), which is an amazing spanish fast food restaurant. It is one of my favorites so I was excited when we stumbled across it. We finished up and made our way to Hertz to exchange our rental car. After we got there and waited like 30 min we received some good news. They were all out of compact cars so they had to give us another car. And like Martin (Luther King) did for the people we were upgraded:
Anyways we got in our car and made the drive over to the rain forest. The drive over was cool and I got a chance to put some of my photography skills to work and I took these cool shots with the camera:

We made it to the rain forest around 4:45 which was cool because the forest closed at 6 (well a forest can never close but they lock the gates). The rain forest was AMAZING. The leaves, the greens, the birds (well bird sounds which I think may have been from a CD) and the view were just perfect. We drove up the forest and stopped at a waterfall, an old tower, and Juan Diego creek. And then made our way back down. From the rain forest you can look out over the mountains and see the ocean in the distance. It was almost like a poem. Very peaceful up there. Usually I'm not a big fan of nature but I have to say it was a highlight of our trip.

(beause Im running short on time I have to shorten the last half up)

We decided to have dinner in Old San Juan. We choose another Puerto Rican (ish) place and again I was totally in awe of the food. GREAT FOOD. I have ordered the same type of Churrasco steak every night and it hasn't let me down. It was soooo great. And the plantains were the best I have had in Puerto Rico. Dinner was followed by a trip to the Intercontinental Hotel and Casino to hit up a few slots. JC and I were quickly kings of the 5 cent machines. I went home 10 dollars down and JC went home a winner with 10 dollars in his pocket. We got back to our room and setup our mini bar and drank (danced and spinned) our night away.

My spanish word of the day was: calle

San Juan (Day 2)

I made it a goal to try and blog every night, but here I am this morning sitting in bed looking out the window (actually the picture on the left is my current view) and blogging a day later. But its no big deal I guess because Im on vacation so I can slack a little.


In my first blog I said I would post pictures of our lovely room in 801 so here they are below:





Yesterday started out very early. JC and I woke up around 7:30ish and kind of lounged around before deciding to head down to the beach and get sun for a little bit. We had looked at the weather for San Juan for the week and it said that it was going to be thunder storms but we were excitied to see that it was beautiful outside when we went down to the beach. Sunny and felt like 90 degrees. We setup shop under a nice little umberlla on the beach and watched the waves( if you would even call them that) before running into the water. The water was the perfect temp. (not too cold, where your balls freeze off and not too warm, where it feels like you just swam into a kiddie pool and all the little kids pee'd at once) and JC and I swam around for a little bit and decided to get lunch.


Lunch was from another Spanish restaurant which was walking distance from the hotel. It was GREAT. I ordered Chicken and rice and beans (i (heart) rice and beans here) and a strawberry freepe (with liquer). I have to say that I love spanish food a lot. I think the thing im going to miss the most when I leave here is the food. Im going to have to learn how to cook it all or find a nice Puerto Rican friend (and I know DY has a few) to hook me up.



We took a trip to our roof top deck and decided to take some pictures from up there (which are the pictures above) and plan out what we wanted to do for the rest of the day. We decided that we wanted to take a trip to the Bacardi run factory, so after a quick google map search and shower we changed and were on our way.

Google Maps said it would take us around 15min to get to the factory so we were happy that it was close. BUT when we got on the road it was far from happy. We got lost a LOT becuse Puerto Rico doesnt like to put exit numbers on their traffic signs, google maps doesnt put complete directions, and we are driving in a foreign place. So two hours later we show up at the Bacardi factory, annoyed to find out that the last tour was at 4:15 and it was 4:45 when we got there. But we wanted to get something out of the trip so we just headed over to the store and stocked up on some rum (peach, razz, limon, gold). After that whole ordeal we just wanted to head back to our room and find some drink reciepes so we could drink our problems away (hahaha not really but any excuse to drink)


We traveled to Old San Juan for dinner at this "modern" spanish restaurant. Back at home in NYC, JC and I usually check menu pages before we pick a place to eat so we can see the menu, look at prices, and read restaurant reviews. Since there isnt a menu pages for San Juan we are stuck having to use Yahoo Travel reviews. The reveiws are helpful but we cant see things on the menu or really get a gauge of the price. The place we chose seemed like a cool place for the price. It was around two dollar signs (which was cool because yesterdays restaurant was three dollar signs). This was our first time going through Old San Juan and it was awesome. All the buildings are beautiful and the roads are cobble stone. The only thing was that parking SUCKED ass and there was a lack of street signs. But eventually we made it to our restaruant. Dinner was GREAT again. It was not AS good as the night before but still really good (except the new world caesar). The only problem was that this restaurant was NOT a two dollar sign restaurant. It was DEF. a four dollar sign restaurant (which isnt a bad thing because the food was great). JC and I decided that we would stop using Yahoo Travel because they werent too accurate and only put the popular high end restuarants. And we want authentic food for a good price!


After dinner we stopped by the grocery store and picked up some juice to stepup our mini bar (to the left) and came back to the hotel and set up shop. We planned to head over to a casino but after about 3 drinks we decided to stay in the room and call it a night.
Today looks like another grat day in San Juan. JC and I are about to head down and get some food and then take a trip to the beach.

My spanish words of the day were: Proxima Salida and Maxima.

San Juan (Day 1)

Today JC and I finally made it to San Juan Puerto Rico. We left Florida around 8:20 this morning and touched ground around 11:20. I have been to Puerto Rico before (well lived here for about 3 years when I was younger) but today was different because it was my first "big boy" vacation. The first vacation I had to take off work for and pay for by myself. This is my first trip with JC so I was super excited about that.



After we landed in San Juan (and waited like 30min for our bags to get to the baggage claim) we went to pickup our rental car and we were off to check into our hotel. We are staying at the San Juan Water and Beach Club. We arrived at our hotel around 12 and found out we were too early to check in. But we realized that all the bad reviews we had read about this place were wrong because this place was HOT.

Since we were both hungry we decided to get out and walkaround and find some food. Near our hotel there were a couple of fast food restaurants and we ended up at a fast food restaurant. I didnt dare to order when we got up to the register, so I made JC brush up on his rusty spanish skills and tell the cashier that we wanted fried chicken, french fries, mac-n-cheese, and a brownie. After we finished up lunch we took a walk along the beach and scoped out the sites. We found a bar right off the ocean and decided to get our drink on (coronas and dos equis; when in Rome). Because it still wasnt check in time JC and I decided to find some beach chairs in front of the hotel and chill out.



When it was finally time to check into our room we were super excited because we were both worn out and wanted to take a quick nap. When we got to our room a door man brought our luggage up and he left.We didnt tip him. We didnt even know we should or how much (im from the south and im not used to high end hotels I guess) but after a quick google search we decided that next time we saw him we were going to give him a few bucks (lucky he turned out to be our valet guy). The room is super awesome. Very modern, nice view of the ocean (I can lay in the bed and open the curtains and see the water!) I will have pictures tomorrow when the room isnt as messy!



We finished up our naps (well "naps") and decided to get some food. I dont remember the name of the restaurnt(because it was in spanish) but the food was GOOOOOD! I had some of the best rice and beans I have ever had in my life. (not to take away anything for the amazing rice and beans JC makes). Speaking of which I totally have some left over steak in the fridge that im thinking about eating after this blog. If this is what Puerto Rican food is going to be like all week, im going to be doin the damn thing on the CTD tip. Dinner was followed by a few drinks and a night trip to the beach (which was interupted by bugs. ick!)


Puerto Rico day 1 was great. Im looking forward to exploring the city more, practicing some spanish (pare, was my word of the day), spending time on the beach, and eating amazing dinners. I will be updating some more tomorrow but right now im going to join JC, with some much needed rest.


Adios!

Cheating Chad

Soundtrack: Amy Winehouse- Rehab

So I cheated…..

Not once but twice. (one I didn’t even realize just did it unintentionally)

So on Sunday I blogged about my consumption of alcohol. I felt like when I drank I reached a level of out of controlness that wasn’t fun. So JC and I decided to go on a 2 week, no alcohol challenge. Well my friends challenge is over and I lost.

I first sorta gave in on Monday during a celebration for my boss becoming a partner at my company and changing our company name celebration. There was champagne floating around and in celebration I drank a glass without even realizing it.

The second time was yesterday. And I did it intentionally. Last night JC, DY and I decided to venture to our favorite Thursday night joint, club 13. The reason this is a favorite of ours is because they have a free cover and 1 dollar drinks until 11. So of course I can pass up that deal (even if I’m on a challenge).

Well by 11:30 and 4-5 tequila sours (def. drink of choice) down Im drunk. Not wasted but really intoxicated. And officially felt like I pulled a Lindsay Lohan.

But last night as im doing a mean Britney Spears neck roll (well half ass’d because my neck was sooo sore last week from doing it full out), dancing to Me Against the Music, I came to the realization that even though I lost the challenge. I kinda won at the same time. I had a great time. And felt like that as long as im not too out of control drinking is something that I enjoy. I just gotta learn my cut off limit and I will be good.

On a quick side note: DY and I would like apologize to every homeless person we offended with our beat-box freestyle homeless rap. And that even though the lyrics were kind of mean, we still did some good. We gave the guy some change, a good time, and put a smile on everyone’s faces around us. Bitter Sweet Aye?

Flowing Thoughts

Three Word Traffic

Emotions are often left unanswered, unexplained
If unexplorable was a word, I would use it to attain
I sit here for so long racking my brain
To draw blanks
I can’t express this remorseful contentment
Contrite achievement
Listening to my heart only gets me half way
I put up road signs with cautions and red lights
My mouth detours around what my heart is trying to say
The words stop right before I can spit them out
I have it all reversed
My inner talks and my mouth thinks
My inner says three words
And my mouth is afraid of the thought
When the words come out and enclose this unscathed air
Fear contours the cadence of my beating heart
Emotions surpass time
Thoughts are changed by each moment
You whisper three words back
Assuring green lights

Out Of Control Oliver

Soundtrack: Sliver Chair- Ana's Song (Open Fire)

Yesterday was Cinco De Mayo and in true Cinco De Mayo style DY and I decided to map out a few places in the city that were celebrating. We picked a restaurant,two bars on the east side, and a friend's Cinco De Mayo party in Harlem. I started out the morning with JC taking shots of tequila. And from there it was down hill. Huge 24oz big drink at brunch, 3 margaritas (acutally big tequila shots) at the first bar, Corona and vodka shots(never again) at the second bar, and numerous shots( like I have no idea how many) at the house party. After almost 12 hours of drinking I cant believe I was even standing (well I heard I was actually crawling at various pints in the night). This morning hearing all the things that I did/said I have come made a few decisions about drinking.

My friends that know me can all tell you that I have a different personality when I drink. They call me "DRUNKY POO CHAD" because its like im not even myself. Im loud, over the top, basically just out of control. Once I start drinking my judgement for when I should cut off completely goes away. And I get to a point where its not any good. Last week I went out around 3 or 4 times and all of those times I was completely trashed. And the next morning I feel a little bad having to go to work or just get out of bed with a massive hangover.

When I heard the stories from last night I was completely embrassed. Esp. about my actions at the party in Harlem. I was in a situation where I only knew 3 or 4 people out of about 15. Everyone else who didnt know me last night saw this side of me thats not great. I hate that thats the first impression they have of me.

I havent decided to completely stop drinking alcohol BUT I have decided that I dont want to get THAT drunk ever again (well only on holidays and special occasions). I want to have like a drink or two and present myself in a way that is respectible. JC and I have decided not to drink any alchol until we head off to Puerto Rico in about 2 weeks. Im hoping I can stick with it. We are pretty good about sticking to rules we set for ourselves.( we decided to stop drinking sodas, also we are practicing being GREEN (or going green)).

So if you ran into me last night and yu are reading this, I apologize. But Im about to enter into my personal rehab. Wish me luck!

On Life, In Intoxication.....

I got this note from a homeless person pn the way home tonight. (actually aia got a book which was later replaced by this "unfortune" cookie note)

It is better to talk with God than about him.

OMG who the fuck tas about him

*PS....i had one too many dirns tonight.

I'll Take It Back To The Start......

Soundtrack: Nelly Furtado- Afraid

I have finally taken the leap and have decided to take my blog from myspace over here to blogspot. I kind of like the idea of having a blog on an actual blog site. And plus I was really anexious to conform. Conforming is like the new '07? (or is that black people)

I had made up my mind for weeks that I was going to make a blog here but for weeks I avoided it and kept having "things" come up or reasons why I would never start. I thought I was just being lazy but there was definitely something more to it which is the topic that I have chosen to post my first blog on.

Expression..... How do you express yourself in a blog that has the ability to be broadcasted to millions on the internet. (really im sure this blog will be read by like 10 people but hey dream big right?) There are soo many different sides to me that I use for different situations. Now this isnt saying that Im not myself or im being "fake", but its just how much of myself I am willing to let go around certain people.

So here comes the dilema. How should I express all the sides to me in a blog where someone could stumble across it and only know one side? How can I be completey honest but reserved at the same time?

Its funny because I dont have answers to these questions. But this blog will be a great platform to express myself and help me find the balance that I am searching for. I hope that the progression from each posts gets me to a place where I can write what I want and not feel so censored.

I named this blog "tip of my tongue" because I want to write what comes to my mouth and have it go done unedited (count the number of typos). I say things that some people might find rude or mean, but hey thats me. I can find humor in all things in life, which I plan to share. This blog will be whatever comes thought comes to mind that I feel that I should post. Hopefully the thoughts come more frequently. But who knows........